by Tina Tessina

Learning to be patient and remain calm reduces and relieves stress and worry. Cultivating patience is really learning impulse control– it’s an issue in self control. You can learn how to do “emotional maintenance” and shake off stress, keep on track of what you want to do, and let go of frustration when something is getting to you.  Patience is learning how to wait until you’ve thought before acting and made sure you understand the options and take control of your own ideas and decisions.  It’s a growth process, a transformation of self through awareness and learning.
To acquire patience, learn not to act on impulse, but change your thinking and attitude, and reach out for support and encouragement.  To learn the necessary patience and determination that enhances your communication, these seven steps will help.

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by Tina Tessina

1. You can repeat some of the things you did when you were first dating: go back to the first place you met, watch a DVD (complete with popcorn) of the first movie you saw together, go out for lunch at the little café near your old job, or wander through the park.

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By Tina Tessina

Women value intimacy, safety for themselves and their children, and emotional connection. Therefore, they long for the following qualities in a man:

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by Tina Tessina

The skills couples need to keep intimacy alive in a long-term relationship differ from new relationship intimacy skills, and they’re not obvious because people don’t talk about them. Most couples need to lower their expectations of romance and glamour and raise the level of fun they have together. Regular weekly talks (I call them State of the Union discussions) keep the problems minor, the resentment level down, and the communication open, so that there is time and space for intimacy. In a successful, long-term relationship, passion becomes a shared sense of humor and goodwill toward each other. I spend every day teaching couples how to do these things.

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By Tina Tessina

Marriage can be frustrating and disappointing, especially if you don’t have the skills to fix it. But giving in to the frustration and leaving may turn out to be the worst thing you ever did.
Consider these reasons to stay:

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by Tina Tessina

If your spouse has had an affair, that’s tough enough, but finding out there’s a resulting child is really devastating. Your marriage can survive, if both of you still want it.  Here are three things to consider:

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by Tina Tessina

1. What is your definition of commitment?

You and your partner define your relationship.  Know what your relationship means to each of you, to avoid repeating past mistakes, getting stuck in uncomfortable roles, or fighting about what your commitment is. Talk about what you mean by relationship, commitment, love, and faithfulness. You’ll be amazed by what you learn.

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by Tina Tessina

1. Keep it simple: Don’t make your proposal plans too elaborate.  The more complicated the proposal plan, the more likely something will go wrong.  Make it a private moment, between just you two.  You can save the big splash for the engagement announcement.  If you guessed wrong about your partner’s willingness, you’ll be disappointed, but at least you won’t be publicly embarrassed.

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It’s not always easy to be in a relationship, no matter how old you are. Conflicts are impossible to avoid, but if you have the right tools, you can avoid conflicts from becoming destructive. Below is a list of tips from our very own Dr. Romance about cultivating the healthiest relationship possible.

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By Tina Tessina, PhD

Has your sex life gone to sleep? No matter what the old wives’ tales say about it, there’s no reason not to have sex in long-term relationships.  Sex not only will keep your love energized, it’s also fun exercise, a great stress-releaser, and aerobic: it raises your heart rate and your respiration — and you don’t even notice you’re working hard.

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