Conversation or Sex
November 2nd, 2006
I read this survey that was included in the Ladies Home Journal the other day asking a wide variety of questions about intimacy and relationships. I was in the doctor�s office with my two teenagers and was sharing the results of the survey with them. The question that still stays with me and shocked them as much as me was �If you had to choose between conversation and sex with your guy for a month what would you give up?� Can you believe a whopping 80% would give up sex?
I guess I should stop being shocked. The men�s responses were not surprisingly skewed towards sex over conversation, but still I had to ask myself, what could you want to talk about that badly�Here�s the thing that I have found to be true, my verbal conversations have more depth, intimacy and real listening when we have a physical conversation first. Sex connects two people in a way that words can sometimes confuse.
I sometimes wonder if I am guilty of oversimplifying when I say this � especially in light of the fact that I am clearly part of a minority, but I really believe that we seriously underrate pleasure as a medium of communication. We dismiss our bodies and their needs as being less than or at least more base than the thoughts floating around our heads- My body is more honest than my mind if I am willing to listen to it. The stories in my mind can build castles and destroy empires left to their own devices. Have the conversation with your bodies first , you will probably tend to agree more.


