Archive for the 'Positivity Quest' Category

Positivity Again: Finding Forgiveness in the Last Moment

Tuesday, February 18th, 2014

IMG_6087 “Whenever we perceive ourselves as less than worthy of love we need forgiveness.”

 

I have spent the last four years seeking forgiveness with my father. Multiple trips with my family to Florida, a cruise for his 80th birthday… nothing softened him.  He was consistent with his anger and demeaning ways right to the end, but now that he is laying in his final hours in a hospice, the secret door to the forgiveness that has been eluding our relationship came clear to me. All this time I had been thinking I  wanted to forgive him for the many ways he demeaned me.  But in the end, it was never about forgiving him at all. His behavior towards me only worsened with his aging, keeping me from seeing the way toward him.  All along,  the real block to forgiveness was in me.  I couldn’t access any memories of feeling loved by him, or remember when I loved him and that was what kept me from forgiveness.

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Positivity Again: Learning Courage

Friday, February 14th, 2014

bballThe Olympic coverage has to make you think about how we learn courage. Watching people throw themselves in the air for 3 or 4 spins to land perfectly on their feet is mind boggling when you consider what happened inside of them on the first day they decided they were going to learn how to do this trick.  What is that special energy that opens us up to the unknown, the potential of serious injury with the gusto required  to perform these supernatural acts?

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Positivity Again: Living in the Body

Wednesday, February 12th, 2014

breastcancerSometimes I can’t figure out how to create a positive relationship to what is happening in and around me. A young woman I know, who has been struggling with a disease they have no cure for, lays in a coma after a brutal procedure to stabilize her neck.  Cancer metastasized in another young woman fighting for more time with her young kids. It is difficult, witnessing old age turning diseased and the pain of letting go of a body that is broken and worn down.  The thing that I return to over and over is that the entire of truth of our worldly experience comes down to our body.   Health and well being are the ground for everything else that happens to and in you, which explains the ridiculous percentage of national income feeding our health care system.

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Positivity Again: Feeling Loveable

Monday, February 10th, 2014

heartcouple7resizedWhen I believe that I am unlovable, the world closes in. This is true for all of us.  The only real opening any of us can work towards, pray for and believe in is our own inherent loveablity.  For this we need only practice being loving.  Most difficult, especially when things are not working is to love ourselves. I have been praying and chanting and suffering these last days, waking up anxious, praying some more about the truth of my life, the weight of my flaws, the potential I have of creating the life I dream about.

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Positivity Again: Making Mistakes

Friday, February 7th, 2014

desertYou have to have bad days, even bad weeks sometimes.  You know the good ones in comparison to the bad ones.  This is what I am reminding myself this week as things anticipated are not happening and things that I thought were fine are completely broken. Making mistakes in a product business is really costly and generally takes a significant effort to dig out of. It is almost always the smallest, most obvious details that are overlooked… Mistakes that no one notices that snowball into huge mistakes.

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Positivity Again: Driving a Mercedes

Tuesday, February 4th, 2014

mercedesA week ago I was on the East Coast for a few meetings.  One of my flights was cancelled and the closest I could get was to Washington DC, which was going to oblige me to drive to Pennsylvania to meet with Rite Aid.  One way cars are the most expensive ones to rent, and as it happened on Hotwire,  the cheapest car to get was a luxury model.  On arriving they offered me a Cadillac with no CD player- or a huge Lincoln. I wondered if I could downgrade.  Then this sweet guy says, “Just you wait right here, I have the car for you…. nicest car this place has….”  A few minutes later he pulls up this beautiful black Mercedes which had 4500 miles on it.

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Positivity Again: Believing in Sufficiency

Friday, January 31st, 2014

hand2Running a product company is like trying to solve an algebraic equation that has no answer.  By definition, you never have the money you need to get bigger, because the inventory you need to buy now won’t sell until much late and the faster you grow, the more you have to buy now for later.

The biggest expense that any business has is the cost of people to help you grow. In some financial industries that don’t sell any tangible products that cost alone can be 80% of the money they generate.  This is another cost of growth that defies equations,  you often need better people than you can actually afford before you can afford them.

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Positivity Again: Happy for Them

Thursday, January 30th, 2014

earthheartI think something is happening to me. This new attention to positivity is going in deeper than before- and I am able to feel grateful and generous at times that used to be taken over by anxiety. The other day, on my trip to see Rite Aid and Kroger, I stopped in CVS and saw a couple of my main natural competitors on the shelf.

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Positivity Again: Still Dreaming

Tuesday, January 28th, 2014

airportcoupleTraveling again.  Moving through time zones across the country.  I am in Baltimore at the historical Lord Baltimore hotel, which is currently under renovation. My room is one of the first to be renovated.  It is beautifully appointed, but they didn’t account for the single digit temperatures when they were dealing with the old single pane windows.  The bathroom is an ice box.

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Positivity Again: How Lucky That I Get To…

Wednesday, January 22nd, 2014

gratitude1It has been really foggy where I live for days. Yesterday, the sun popped through in part of town and it was astonishing to me how bright the world seemed. I felt like I could breathe again and I was uplifted. My mood was bright for the first time in days.   Again today, though the fog is covering our little community like a cap. I hear that just 25 miles in any direction there is light.  Getting up and getting started with this darkness hanging around has been hard.

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